PRIVATE MESSAGES

jesi · Number of posts: 127 Age: 102 Registration date: 2006-02-13

Thingywhatsit wrote:

Not as advanced in years as me !

Ha ha!

I can give you a year or so, I'm sure!

Hope you enjoy your stay in the geriatric ward, then . . .

flower

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Seventh grandchild Keyran born 6 OCT2007

jesi · Number of posts: 127 Age: 102 Registration date: 2006-02-13

I've been away for a few months (had no internet, actually) and I've got NO private messages waiting for me when I arrived back!

Boo Hoo!

۞۞۞۞۞ .
. . . ~ ! ♥♥ ! ~ ........................................................... ~ jes ~ ! ♥♥ !

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http://www.ciao.co.uk/Member__jesi_5255275
(90 reviews on CiaoUK)

http://www.ciao.de/account.php/MemberId/1360223

http://www.ciao.it/account.php/MemberId/331830

Seventh grandchild Keyran born 6 OCT2007

Averilla · Number of posts: 129 Registration date: 2006-02-28

Well maybe this will be a good thing..so long as it doesn't end up like Ciao, whereupon someone suddenly finds themselves unable to post private messages without any warnings given whatsoever. I think as long as you stand by what you have said and do make sure you issue one warning then it should work, shouldn't it.

Also I think it would be a good idea to determine exactly what warrants abuse here. After all a lot of jokey messages are sent and can be taken in the wrong context by someone who may be very sensitive. Clear guidelines may need to be set

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helencbradshaw · Subject: Re: PRIVATE MESSAGES Fri 27 Jul 2007, 23:30

how can you set guidelines for stuff like that though...jokey messages gone wrong...well it is the same as inappropriate jokes at work...if it is inappropriate, it is inappropriate and there is no excuse. It aint rocket science surely!

Offense is in the eye of the beholder, at the end of the day, regardless. So debating "abuse" is a fruitless issue to me, especially given some of the "abuse" that does go around that orange place.

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Averilla · Number of posts: 129 Registration date: 2006-02-28

Sorry but I get to differ. Abuse should be defined, perfectly innocent comments can and, indeed have, been twisted in such a way that they can be called abuse. I maybe can't explain this properly but maybe Rachel can !!

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Thingywhatsit · Subject: Re: PRIVATE MESSAGES Sun 29 Jul 2007, 11:19

Okay assessment of current situation with private messages.

Members have no powers to block an individual. This causes great problems if a message is sent to another member that upset them. Different things upset different people for different reasons, and what is mild to some is hurtful to others. I will not be drawn into personal conflict between members, but have come up with a solution that suits the site.

If a member reports a message that has upset them with a screenshot and explains why, the staff here will take a decision between them as to whether that member loses the right to send messages. First decision: Majority of two admin must make the decision.

The rights of the person who sent the message will be cut off while a decision is made in order to let people calm down.

If the person accused promises in an email not to bother the person who accused again ever by message, their messages will be reinstated. BUT on another report of problems, that message facility will be taken away with no conversation IF two admin agree that their use of the message system abuses it.

Its clear cut and simple and if a reinstated message facility is given to an offender and they abuse it, they will have the message facility taken away from them.

Ailran · Subject: Re: PRIVATE MESSAGES Sun 29 Jul 2007, 12:35

Yay well done that would make perfect sense to me. If nothing else maybe it will make some people think about what they are writing and others will stop doing it completely!

Ciao's Favourite Member · Number of posts: 1075 Registration date: 2006-12-20

Thingywhatsit wrote:

Okay assessment of current situation with private messages.

Members have no powers to block an individual. This causes great problems if a message is sent to another member that upset them. Different things upset different people for different reasons, and what is mild to some is hurtful to others. I will not be drawn into personal conflict between members, but have come up with a solution that suits the site.

If a member reports a message that has upset them with a screenshot and explains why, the staff here will take a decision between them as to whether that member loses the right to send messages. First decision: Majority of two admin must make the decision.

The rights of the person who sent the message will be cut off while a decision is made in order to let people calm down.

If the person accused promises in an email not to bother the person who accused again ever by message, their messages will be reinstated. BUT on another report of problems, that message facility will be taken away with no conversation IF two admin agree that their use of the message system abuses it.

Its clear cut and simple and if a reinstated message facility is given to an
offender and they abuse it, they will have the message facility taken away from them.

Might I suggest that the PM privileges of the individual are retained while any "investigation" continues. As it stands, you seem to be suggesting that you are adopting Ciao's "Guilty until proven innocent" mandate, Rachel. Pretty much everyone on FOIB agrees is shocking and I don't think they'd like to see it in action here. I know I certainly wouldn't!

Secondly, any reporting member should be providing screen shots of the entire conversation. A message on its own could be construed as upsetting, but in the context of the entire conversation, it might not be. Or it could well be that the accusing member initiated contact/chose the tone of the conversation. You might also consider having screenshots from both parties to validate what's being said on all counts.

In the quoted post, I sense an undercurrent throughout that the accusing member can pretty much do what they choose as individual messages are counted, not entire conversations.

At all times, I'd like the investigators to bear in mind this quote from Torr, which pretty much sums up Ciao members to a tee:

"Almost anything will be offensive to someone if that someone is sufficiently
unreasonable."

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spoilt_little_brat · Subject: Re: PRIVATE MESSAGES Sun 29 Jul 2007, 14:27

Ciao's Favourite Member wrote:

Secondly, any reporting member should be providing screen shots of the entire conversation. A message on its own could be construed as upsetting, but in the context of the entire conversation, it might not be. Or it could well be that the accusing member initiated contact/chose the tone of the conversation. You might also consider having screenshots from both parties to validate what's being said on all counts.

Yeah more then just a screen shot of the one message could be a good idea.

plipplop · Number of posts: 210 Registration date: 2006-04-25

You forgot to mention going to bed without tea, as well.

atticusuk · Subject: Re: PRIVATE MESSAGES Sun 29 Jul 2007, 16:20

Ciao's Favourite Member wrote:

I suggest that you stink like poo

Yeah look at the PM Aaron sent me, ban the bastard.

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Ciao's Favourite Member · Number of posts: 1075 Registration date: 2006-12-20

I never said "poo" Sad

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